My Story (or at least some of it)

I am a daughter, sister, wife, mother and friend. Above all of this I am a true believer and follower of Jesus Christ.

Although, it didn't always used to be this way.

When I was younger I was wreckless and rebellious. I was a deliquent and did many, many things I was not supposed to do. I was very manipulative and had many different faces. I drank and did drugs and witnessed many different things a young person should never have to see. I did believe in God but truly thought He had given up on me and therefore I did not like or respect Him.

Little did I know He had a plan for me.

One day, while drinking myself silly on my balcony with some friends, I heard an inner voice ask me "What the hell are you doing? You deserve so much better than this!" (I believe in treatment they call that a moment of clarity. ) Of course it didn't stop me from drinking that night but it did start a chain reaction of events that lead me to where I am today.

I did check myself into treatment not long after that event and I have been sober every since. That was on March 3, 2000.

Since that time I have graduated from college with a B.S. in Geography specializing in cultures. I have found the love of my life, Jeff, and we got married on May 27, 2006. Very soon after that we got pregnant (surprise!) and we had Gracie on March 17, 2007. We moved to SC in June of 2007 and we had our son, Donovan, on February 10, 2010.

I have been blessed in so many ways. I have the love of a good man, 2 beautiful children, the support and love of a wonderful family and amazing friendships that have lasted through good and bad. I know that God has a purpose for my life and I am so grateful that He has given me a second chance at living.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Borrowing Faith


I saw a quote today that really inspired me. It was directed to a pastor who had moved from Michigan to Georgia to plant a new church. This pastor had become very discouraged with his new church community. The numbers were not what he was seeking and he had no desire to lead a small congregation.
After 3 years he went back to Michigan to seek guidance (and possibly a job) from his former pastor and original sponsor of the church planting endeavor.
His former pastor said to him "If you have lost faith, borrow mine." The pastor returned to Georgia and continued in his work at the church he had started. The congregation grew and today they have over 3400 members in that church. All because someone believed in him even though he did not believe in himself.
Have you every borrowed faith from someone? How many times? And why did you lose your faith in the first place?
I know for me....I usually lose faith in myself. I start to tell myself that I can't handle things or that I am weak. Then discouragement settles in and makes a nice home in my head. I try to take a stand and snap out of it but it doesn't always work. My self esteem usually hits bottom and I begin searching for a way up.
And that is when I start to see other people and their faith in me.
I hear others words and see their actions toward me. I look and notice how other people have faith and believe in me. So I take their faith and remember that until I gain my own back; which usually doesn't take very long. At least not anymore.
On the other hand, I continue to have faith in many other areas in my life. I have great faith in God and I know He has His hand in everything. He will always provide my needs.
I have great faith in my family and know that they will be there for me even if I can't be there for myself.
I have great faith in others around me. I know that the people I choose to associate with are made for great things. He has a plan and purpose for all of us and it is nothing we can't handle or accomplish without His help. There is no doubt in my mind that I will rise up when He calls my name to come home!
So I pray that my faith in me will continue to grow and become stronger, just as my faith in our God has grown and can not be broken!

And if you ever find yourself lost in faith, borrow mine.


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