My Story (or at least some of it)

I am a daughter, sister, wife, mother and friend. Above all of this I am a true believer and follower of Jesus Christ.

Although, it didn't always used to be this way.

When I was younger I was wreckless and rebellious. I was a deliquent and did many, many things I was not supposed to do. I was very manipulative and had many different faces. I drank and did drugs and witnessed many different things a young person should never have to see. I did believe in God but truly thought He had given up on me and therefore I did not like or respect Him.

Little did I know He had a plan for me.

One day, while drinking myself silly on my balcony with some friends, I heard an inner voice ask me "What the hell are you doing? You deserve so much better than this!" (I believe in treatment they call that a moment of clarity. ) Of course it didn't stop me from drinking that night but it did start a chain reaction of events that lead me to where I am today.

I did check myself into treatment not long after that event and I have been sober every since. That was on March 3, 2000.

Since that time I have graduated from college with a B.S. in Geography specializing in cultures. I have found the love of my life, Jeff, and we got married on May 27, 2006. Very soon after that we got pregnant (surprise!) and we had Gracie on March 17, 2007. We moved to SC in June of 2007 and we had our son, Donovan, on February 10, 2010.

I have been blessed in so many ways. I have the love of a good man, 2 beautiful children, the support and love of a wonderful family and amazing friendships that have lasted through good and bad. I know that God has a purpose for my life and I am so grateful that He has given me a second chance at living.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Inconvenient



This is something that has been coming up a lot lately for me. Probably has something to do with our series right now in church but also because I am about to make some life changing decisions, including going back to school.

I am very excited about this venture. I know this is what God wants me to do and pursue but when I stop and think about what all it is going to entail, it really starts to feel like an inconvenience. I have so much going on already with life and I really don't need to add one more thing. Especially something big like school.

I have done the 'school thing' before and I know how much work this is truly going to be. I got my Bachelors before I had children and a life that involves more than just me. Now to add that kind of work load on top of my life now is truly an overwhelming thought.

So I have been praying about this and asking God how exactly am I supposed to do this. And basically it comes down to I am going to have to give some things up. Ok...what do I give up? How can I make this change more convenient for me?

The truth is this is going to be inconvenient to my life. Period. Yes I am going to give up doing a few things for a while but there are many things I simply can not just give up.

So I started thinking if Jesus ever felt this way. Was He every overwhelmed with life and what that all entails? Did He ever say we are too inconvenient to pursue and love because His life is just too hectic at the moment? Picture the soldiers coming to take him away to go before Pontius Pilate and Jesus saying, "Ya know this isn't really going to work for me today. I have so much going on right now. Check back with me in about 3 months." (In case you are wondering, that didn't happen.)

The truth is this new adventure is only going to bring me closer to Him. It will be inconvenient in some ways but the rewards far out weigh all the troubles. He gave His all just show how much he loves and believes in me. He created me for a purpose and he has a plan. And I don't want to have the attitude of inconvenience when it comes to His great plan for me.

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