My Story (or at least some of it)

I am a daughter, sister, wife, mother and friend. Above all of this I am a true believer and follower of Jesus Christ.

Although, it didn't always used to be this way.

When I was younger I was wreckless and rebellious. I was a deliquent and did many, many things I was not supposed to do. I was very manipulative and had many different faces. I drank and did drugs and witnessed many different things a young person should never have to see. I did believe in God but truly thought He had given up on me and therefore I did not like or respect Him.

Little did I know He had a plan for me.

One day, while drinking myself silly on my balcony with some friends, I heard an inner voice ask me "What the hell are you doing? You deserve so much better than this!" (I believe in treatment they call that a moment of clarity. ) Of course it didn't stop me from drinking that night but it did start a chain reaction of events that lead me to where I am today.

I did check myself into treatment not long after that event and I have been sober every since. That was on March 3, 2000.

Since that time I have graduated from college with a B.S. in Geography specializing in cultures. I have found the love of my life, Jeff, and we got married on May 27, 2006. Very soon after that we got pregnant (surprise!) and we had Gracie on March 17, 2007. We moved to SC in June of 2007 and we had our son, Donovan, on February 10, 2010.

I have been blessed in so many ways. I have the love of a good man, 2 beautiful children, the support and love of a wonderful family and amazing friendships that have lasted through good and bad. I know that God has a purpose for my life and I am so grateful that He has given me a second chance at living.

Monday, December 13, 2010


Christmas. This is one the the most wonderful times of the year (and not just because there is a song that says so). This is the time of year when people seem to smile a little bit easier, open their hearts a little bit more and give a little more freely. This is also the time of year we get the celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ together.

But Christmas is not the only holiday that is celebrated this time of year.
There is also Hanukkah and Kwanzaa.

Gracie has been learning about these holidays in school and has been telling me all about them. I am thrilled she is learning about different backgrounds and cultures. She knows what her family believes and has told us many times that she also believes Jesus is her King and the son of God. But she also seems very sensitive to other traditions and beliefs and I think that is a good thing.

But having said that she has been asking us a lot of questions about holidays. In these series of questions we have had to explain the differences in holidays and how other peoples beliefs are not the same as ours.

That's when she asked the question we were not expecting.
"Who's right mommy?" I had no idea what to say. So, I simply said "Let's ask daddy when he gets home." (I have discussed it with Jeff so he would be aware if the question came up again.)

Who is right? This has had me thinking lately. A part of me really wants to say that we are right as Christians but the other part of me doesn't want to say that because I want her to keep an open mind. I want her to be able to make her own decisions and respect the decisions of others. I want her to have relationships with other people of different cultures. This is how we learn, grow and reach understanding. And with understanding comes peace, which is what I want for my children.

Plus I had this image in my head of her telling a little Jewish girl at school that she was wrong and that we are right. The last thing I want is to start some kind of religious rivalry up at her school.

I think her curiosity is healthy and I am very glad she feels comfortable talking to us and asking us questions. I think curiosity leads to creativity. And I am very proud of my curious, and creative, little girl.

Sunday, December 5, 2010


I have had so much on my mind lately. I don't know if its just this time of year or the seasons changing in my life. But I have been real mindful lately.
I feel like God is trying to teach me a lesson in tolerance. I have been noticing things and attitudes from family, friends, acquintances, even strangers that have had me thinking. Frankly I have been getting a little bit annoyed and I feel like I shouldn't be. I feel like these are many things and feelings I should just let go. But for some reason, I am having trouble doing that. I also feel like if I say anything or give any particular examples that I will be rude and I definitely don't want that.
So I think if God is teaching me a little bit about tolerance, I would appreciate more than just opportunities to be tolerant. (I know, careful what you wish for) I would like so methods on how to be tolerant and letting some of these feelings go. Completely turning them over to Him. I know by doing this I will me making more room for Him to fill up my life and be at peace. But sometimes that is a lot easier said than done.
So God please send a way for me to work through these feelings, thoughts and emotions as them come. Please help me to give them to you and not take them back. You have always handled things way better than I ever could. Thanks.