My Story (or at least some of it)

I am a daughter, sister, wife, mother and friend. Above all of this I am a true believer and follower of Jesus Christ.

Although, it didn't always used to be this way.

When I was younger I was wreckless and rebellious. I was a deliquent and did many, many things I was not supposed to do. I was very manipulative and had many different faces. I drank and did drugs and witnessed many different things a young person should never have to see. I did believe in God but truly thought He had given up on me and therefore I did not like or respect Him.

Little did I know He had a plan for me.

One day, while drinking myself silly on my balcony with some friends, I heard an inner voice ask me "What the hell are you doing? You deserve so much better than this!" (I believe in treatment they call that a moment of clarity. ) Of course it didn't stop me from drinking that night but it did start a chain reaction of events that lead me to where I am today.

I did check myself into treatment not long after that event and I have been sober every since. That was on March 3, 2000.

Since that time I have graduated from college with a B.S. in Geography specializing in cultures. I have found the love of my life, Jeff, and we got married on May 27, 2006. Very soon after that we got pregnant (surprise!) and we had Gracie on March 17, 2007. We moved to SC in June of 2007 and we had our son, Donovan, on February 10, 2010.

I have been blessed in so many ways. I have the love of a good man, 2 beautiful children, the support and love of a wonderful family and amazing friendships that have lasted through good and bad. I know that God has a purpose for my life and I am so grateful that He has given me a second chance at living.

Friday, November 25, 2011


I love this holiday!  It is such a great time to get with family and friends and just enjoy being together.  Thanksgiving is right in the middle of the season of fall so the leaves are beautiful colors and filling up the ground.  People gather around a table for a feast and talk about how thankful we all are for the people and things we have on our lives.  But this time of year always leaves me with a question and a prayer.
First the question.  Why does Thanksgiving get overlooked?  It seems like right after Halloween (or in some cases Halloween hasn't even past yet) and Christmas decorations are already going up.  Not even in just department stores but homes as well.  People start making plans for 'black friday' shopping and figuring out who and where will have the best deals for gifts.  Radio stations start playing Christmas music and venues start promoting Christmas specials.  I really feel like Thanksgiving gets that shaft and it just doesn't seem fair.  This is such a great holiday about blessings and gratitude.
Which leads me into my prayer.  My prayer is that everyone not only celebrates Thanksgiving for the great holiday and tradition it is for this country this time of year but all year long.  We shouldn't just be thankful once a year.  Gratitude should be seen and shown all the time.  Gratitude is an action word and doesn't only exist at the end of November.  So I hope everyone continues to be thankful for not just the blessings in our lives but the blessings yet to come.

Just a little side note: I applaud Nordstroms for not putting up Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving.  They sent out a statement right after Halloween stating they prefer to celebrate each holiday individually.  I know they received a lot of scorn from customers over this decision but I completely agree with them!  Thank you Nordstorms for setting a standard!

Friday, November 11, 2011

A Life Unfinished

It is times like this my heart is so full and yet so broken.  I found out that an old friend of mine, Katy, was killed earlier this year.  When I found this out I immediately broke down and began to cry.
Flashes of memories of our friendship came to mind.  Many good times and laughs, life changing moments shared and tears shed together over the years.  And even though it had been years since we spoke, I still love and miss her.
To find out she is gone and I never really got to say goodbye just causes me emotional and frankly, a little bit of physical pain.  There are many moments we missed in each others lives.  Moments we can now not get back.  Someone chose to cut her life short unexpectedly and because of that things will be left unfinished, until the day comes we will meet again in heaven.
Katy there are so many things I wish I could have said to you.  I am sorry I didn't keep in better contact with you.  Seems like our lives went in separate directions after we finished school.  I have thought about you often and always wanted to best for you.  I have definitely missed your smile and your laughter.  I have missed our talks and our adventures.  And knowing I won't get that back in this life hurts but I do know I will be seeing you again.  Some of my best memories of us are in Yellowstone National Park.  Being wranglers and being able to ride together through some awesome landscape was a dream come true for both of us.  I know though you have the best landscape to ride in now.  You will always hold a special place in my heart-my wrangler in the sky!  I love you babe!  And I am sorry I didn't get to say this before.  Save a ride for me!  I will be looking for you when I come home!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011


When God created her up in heaven He pulled her aside and said, "Child, I have a special purpose for you."  And she said, "Yes Father."
He sent her to this earth to be with us.  He chose a special family to help Jasmine fulfill her special purpose.
Through her short 2 1/2 years on this earth Jasmine went through much pain and suffering.  And yet this angel did it with love and a smile on her face.  She brought so many people together and showed us all something unique.  She taught me love, thankfulness and faith.  Lessons I continue to learn over and over.
She left us and went home to heaven, where she was met with love.  God said to her, "Well done good and faithful servant."

I know we don't always understand why He does what He does.  I know for me I have so many questions. But I am learning to listen closely and to pay attention.  He will answer all questions in time.
Thank you to God and Jasmine for teaching me love, thankfulness, and faith.  Just when I think I am going strong in these areas of my life, I am shown I can do better.
Thank you to her parents for sharing her to the world.  Such a precious and beautiful gift you were given.  And even though she is home now, she will be seen again.  Through all of us that were touched by her short life and when we enter the gates to heaven.  I know she will be waiting for us!

Photo taken by Jessica V. of Jessica V Photography