Birthdays

So tomorrow I turn yet another year old. I have been thinking about all the years past and how much I have accomplished....and yet still the things I want to accomplish.
I am actually pretty content where my life is right now. Yes I still want to keep moving forward and there are things I wish I had. But that's just what they are....they are things. And by having them or not having them will not dramatically change my life for the better or worse.
I am truly happy and peacefully at this moment in time. And I am so excited about the work God is doing in my life and I look forward to another 31 years (and more) on this earth.

Church and life

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEhRucEVzH8

I heard this song this morning coming back from taking Gracie to school. This song really hit me.

I have never met Casting Crowns but some how they wrote a song about my past.

I was running 100mph in the wrong direction and doing things I should not have been doing. I felt like I was screaming for help most of the time but no one heard me.

When I finally did speak up and get some help the last thing I really wanted were 'church goers' talking to me. I felt like they knew nothing about me and what I have been through.

In the past when I did open up to people in the church, I immediately was judged and looked down upon. So how would this be any different.

It took going to AA to find Jesus and bring him back into my heart. A group of drunks showed me that I wasn't alone and I didn't need to be afraid anymore. They gave me the tools to lead a better life, a life with Jesus Christ.

I continued to stay away from church for quite sometime. I still thought they wouldn't understand. How could they? Church people never seemed to have any problems and just delighted talking about people behind their back.

When Jeff and I moved here in 2007 I met someone who was going to a church in Augusta called Quest. Something inside me said 'just go and see. If its not for you at least you can said you tried.'

So Jeff and I went. And what we found was so different from our 'idea' of church.

What I saw at Quest were real people. People that were open and seemed a little more truthful. And when I shared a little bit about my past, they hugged me and welcomed me in. I didn't feel shut out or ignored. I felt loved. I felt like they were genuinely happy to have me there.

It may have taken me years of recovery to finally be able to see what true church is all about. It's just proof God knows what he's doing when it comes to my life. And I am so gratitude he placed people (and continues to place people) in my path that bring me closer to him.

Holidays

Christmas. This is one the the most wonderful times of the year (and not just because there is a song that says so). This is the time of year when people seem to smile a little bit easier, open their hearts a little bit more and give a little more freely. This is also the time of year we get the celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ together.

But Christmas is not the only holiday that is celebrated this time of year.

There is also Hanukkah and Kwanzaa.

Gracie has been learning about these holidays in school and has been telling me all about them. I am thrilled she is learning about different backgrounds and cultures. She knows what her family believes and has told us many times that she also believes Jesus is her King and the son of God. But she also seems very sensitive to other traditions and beliefs and I think that is a good thing.

But having said that she has been asking us a lot of questions about holidays. In these series of questions we have had to explain the differences in holidays and how other peoples beliefs are not the same as ours.

That's when she asked the question we were not expecting.

"Who's right mommy?" I had no idea what to say. So, I simply said "Let's ask daddy when he gets home." (I have discussed it with Jeff so he would be aware if the question came up again.)

Who is right? This has had me thinking lately. A part of me really wants to say that we are right as Christians but the other part of me doesn't want to say that because I want her to keep an open mind. I want her to be able to make her own decisions and respect the decisions of others. I want her to have relationships with other people of different cultures. This is how we learn, grow and reach understanding. And with understanding comes peace, which is what I want for my children.

Plus I had this image in my head of her telling a little Jewish girl at school that she was wrong and that we are right. The last thing I want is to start some kind of religious rivalry up at her school.

I think her curiosity is healthy and I am very glad she feels comfortable talking to us and asking us questions. I think curiosity leads to creativity. And I am very proud of my curious, and creative, little girl.

Tolerance

I have had so much on my mind lately. I don't know if its just this time of year or the seasons changing in my life. But I have been real mindful lately.

I feel like God is trying to teach me a lesson in tolerance. I have been noticing things and attitudes from family, friends, acquintances, even strangers that have had me thinking. Frankly I have been getting a little bit annoyed and I feel like I shouldn't be. I feel like these are many things and feelings I should just let go. But for some reason, I am having trouble doing that. I also feel like if I say anything or give any particular examples that I will be rude and I definitely don't want that.

So I think if God is teaching me a little bit about tolerance, I would appreciate more than just opportunities to be tolerant. (I know, careful what you wish for) I would like so methods on how to be tolerant and letting some of these feelings go. Completely turning them over to Him. I know by doing this I will me making more room for Him to fill up my life and be at peace. But sometimes that is a lot easier said than done.

So God please send a way for me to work through these feelings, thoughts and emotions as them come. Please help me to give them to you and not take them back. You have always handled things way better than I ever could. Thanks.

Thanksgiving

Lately I have had so many people ask me about my Thanksgiving menu.

"Do you have any creative ideas for Thanksgiving?"

"Is there a special glaze you use for the turkey?"

"What is a simple side dish I can put together fast?"

"I want to do traditional, yet creative..can you help?"

These are just a few of the questions I have heard over that last week. So I will post my Thanksgiving menu and if there is anything you would like the recipe to please just message me or email me. I am always happy to share.

However, I will tell you that my mom does most of the cooking. With my 2 little ones, it makes it difficult for me to cook the entire Thanksgiving meal myself. But that's one thing Thanksgiving is all about anyway, spending time with family.

So here is what we are having!

Turkey (of course): The turkey will be baked in the oven and basted. My mom usually handles this but if you have any questions just let me know.

Mashed potatoes with leeks served with brown turkey gravy. (The gravy will be made from turkey drippings from the oven)

Sweet potato casserole with puree brown butter and orange zest (This is a dish that was shared with us last year from Sabrina Dickson and it is absolutely delicious!)

Classic green bean casserole

Roasted brussel sprouts with garlic and thyme

Buttered rolls

Cranberry medley

Oyster or Sausage stuffing (This is something my mom makes but I am sure she would be happy to share the recipe)

And of course pies:

Pumpkin, Pecan, Banana Pudding, and Blueberry

There are several dishes we have made in the past that we are not making this year.

Corn casserole

Espresso Creme Brulee

Roasted potatoes and onions with garlic and rosemary

Pumpkin or Butternut Squash soup

We also prepare a few appetizers for people to snack on since we normally don't eat until around 230 or 3. So we have a relish dish out with olives, pickles and peppers. A meat and cheese tray is usually present and probably some deviled eggs. There are 2 different types of deviled eggs I make (and I am not including classic deviled eggs). I make Smoked salmon deviled eggs and I make loaded deviled eggs. Both are a huge success!

I hope some of this helps and I am flattered that people have come to me about their cooking needs.

I wish everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving and I am looking forward to this holiday season. May God be with you!

Borrowing Faith

I saw a quote today that really inspired me. It was directed to a pastor who had moved from Michigan to Georgia to plant a new church. This pastor had become very discouraged with his new church community. The numbers were not what he was seeking and he had no desire to lead a small congregation.

After 3 years he went back to Michigan to seek guidance (and possibly a job) from his former pastor and original sponsor of the church planting endeavor.

His former pastor said to him "If you have lost faith, borrow mine." The pastor returned to Georgia and continued in his work at the church he had started. The congregation grew and today they have over 3400 members in that church. All because someone believed in him even though he did not believe in himself.

Have you every borrowed faith from someone? How many times? And why did you lose your faith in the first place?

I know for me....I usually lose faith in myself. I start to tell myself that I can't handle things or that I am weak. Then discouragement settles in and makes a nice home in my head. I try to take a stand and snap out of it but it doesn't always work. My self esteem usually hits bottom and I begin searching for a way up.

And that is when I start to see other people and their faith in me.

I hear others words and see their actions toward me. I look and notice how other people have faith and believe in me. So I take their faith and remember that until I gain my own back; which usually doesn't take very long. At least not anymore.

On the other hand, I continue to have faith in many other areas in my life. I have great faith in God and I know He has His hand in everything. He will always provide my needs.

I have great faith in my family and know that they will be there for me even if I can't be there for myself.

I have great faith in others around me. I know that the people I choose to associate with are made for great things. He has a plan and purpose for all of us and it is nothing we can't handle or accomplish without His help. There is no doubt in my mind that I will rise up when He calls my name to come home!

So I pray that my faith in me will continue to grow and become stronger, just as my faith in our God has grown and can not be broken!

And if you ever find yourself lost in faith, borrow mine.

Music

I love music! It is an amazing thing. It has the ability to move me in so many ways. Such a range of emotions I can experience by listening to just one song. Music has the uncanny ability to make me laugh, cry, remember, forget, think, give me strength or make me weak.

Lately I have been mostly listening to Christian contemporary. I love when I get in the car and listen to music I have never really heard before and I feel better about my day. Even after only listening to 2 songs on the radio. Or even better, I

know the song cause we sing it in church and

I can sing along! Now I am not the best singer but in my car I ROCK!

But what truly makes my heart smile is when I am in the car with Gracie and I hear "How Great is Our God" coming from the back seat. She may not know all the words to the song but she gets the most important part of the song out. She may not be able to carry a tune (bless her little heart) but to me she has the voice of an angel!

I just love music! And my little girl!